Weekend Trip: Berlin// Tampons are Drugs
When I visited Amsterdam in February we decided to take a little weekend trip to Berlin. Brett's BFF, Mark, was going to be in town for a film festival. Soooo we decided that we would try and find a place on Airbnb that was in Berlin, but had some access to nature, and also would be a relaxing time. We found this cute Airbnb and it ended up being much more than we expected. Haha. It was on a street called Wolfgang Harlaan Strasse so we just said this all the time in a German accent and still to this day we reference it. Lol.
Anywho, I'll talk more about that later.
We hopped on a train at Central Station and headed to Berlin.
Guess what? If you look like .. me and Brett?... and you're going from Amsterdam to Germany.. watch out because they will just think you are a member of the drug cartel. I don't know what was up with security that day but DAMN. First we got asked all kinds of questions about what we were doing, where we were coming from, etc etc. You know, the norm. Then we got asked if we had been "Smoking doobies" in Amsterdam. Um... Obviously we say no to the people searching for drugs... but UH.. even if we had (we def had) we would have been doing so legally. Then a drug dog sniffed out our bags and moved along. BUT they still decided to search our bags. They dumped out every single content of each of our bags. And then the funniest thing happened...
See this thing? This is an American tampon. Comes with an applicator. You know.. LIKE NORMAL TAMPONS WOULD. (hahah) The man searching my bag pulls out a big wad of tampons, and anyone that knows me knows I always have a complete box of tampons in the vicinity of me at all times. But he was confused by this weird foreign contraption. Yes, it must be drugs. He holds them up in the air and yells across from the other side of the train-- "VUT IS DIS?" to which I respond: "Tampons". Still, he seems bamboozled. "VUT???" He says louder. Waving my tampons through the air. I clear my throat.. "TAMPONS" I say a little louder. Again, this still isn't registering in Mr. German man's ears. Still holding them up he says "SORRE I DON'T UNDERSTAND".
... "LADY PRODUCTS".
His cheeks flush and he quickly shoves them in my bag. I lock eyes with another woman about my age and we silently exchange giggles and pure joy between each other. Then I go on to get drilled and hassled with all of the "mysterious pills" in my purse. Like sinus decongestant, Advil, and essential oils. Eventually she just googled everything I had in my purse because she obviously didn't trust me.
We were cracking up the entire time this was happening. There was absolutely nothing for them to get in our bags, and they had obviously targeted us for some reason. Lawd. Anyways. The lady searching for drugs in pill form asked where we were from and saw Brett's Dutch passport. She then gave him shit and rolled her eyes because he's been in Holland for 3 years and doesn't speak Dutch. *byyeeeeeee*
Anywho. We got to Berlin, regardless of being drug cartel, and got to our little (huge) Airbnb. Click here to see the listing. Turns out that it's more like a spa, complete with enormous bath tubs and a bidet. I should have tried it out, but I didn't. For some reason I just never understood how I would be able to contain the mess within a bidet. Maybe someday I shall try.
This right here is what this place was all about....
It's like some state of the art spa meditation tubs. At night there's colored lights that you turn on, and there is music that plays underwater in the tubs. It also holds a RIDICULOUS amount of water so you have to pay an extra fee and get the homeowner to switch on the extra water heater before using it. The whole set up is very German, in my opinion. This experience was amazing. Brett and I lit some candles, put on some piano music, and meditated while holding hands in the center. There's even little things that prop your neck up so you lay perfectly on top of the water. I wish I had a bathtub like this for every day. I don't think I would ever leave. And I would have a crazy water bill.
We took the train to Berlin proper to see Brett's BFF. Which now, I am realizing I don't have any pictures of them together. Womp. We had dinner and hung out and then we headed back to our humble abode.
TIPS FOR BEING IN GERMANY: Always ask if someone speaks English. I was all flustered at the train station because we kept getting on the wrong train---and went to a DB train information desk. I had come from Holland where everyone speaks English so I automatically just started asking her a question in English. She cuts me off and says, "DO YOU JUST ASSUME I SPEAK ENGLISH???".... in perfect English. I stand there dumbfounded. Like, wut. I'm a stupid American, plz love me. She reminded me of a mean old frog lady cartoon.
We also shot some professional images while we were at this spot. There was some seriouslyyyy good lighting in this house!